The Love Language Mystery?
Okay the mystery is solved. The secret love language has been revealed. I never knew I had a language of love but according to the book by Gary Chapman titled, "The Five Love Languages", I do. This book is a must read for all couples.
Looking back at my relationship with my husband, I would have never thought the problem was not understanding my husband's love lanaguage. My husband and I talked and shared our feelings. He felt comfortable discussing any subject with me, but something was missing. He felt at times he was not getting attention but I didn't understand what he meant.
My husband would often tell me that I didn't pay attention to him. How could that be when I sat on the couch with him almost every night watching family TV or sports. Other times when he called me for our daily chat, he would tell me how much he missed me. He asked if I missed him. Well no, I didn't miss him since I had just seen him about 9 hours earlier. He couldn't understand why I didn't feel the same way he did.
I wasn't the only confused one in the relationship. I would tell my husband we never did anything and he would be confused. We spent plenty of time together. What did I mean we never did anything?
We were communicating but not understanding what the other meant. We love each other very much and treasure the time we spend together but the missing link was not discovered until we read "The Five Love Languages".
I discovered my husband's love language was physical touch, acts of service and words of affirmation. While my love lanaguage is quality time and physicial touch. My husband gift is service and he would do acts of service and thought that was what would please me. He was reflecting his acts of service as to be my love language.
I would not recognize all the things he did and he felt unappreciated because he needed the words of affirmation where I don't. So I was reflecting my own love language on to him.
We read the book, had a discussion and now we have a better understanding of each oher's expectations and needs. It has been easier to recognize the suddle hints that indicate maybe someone needs a hug.
It's not only important to communicate but it's also important to understand your spouse's needs and how your husband is uniquely wired. The mystery has been solved.
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